Everyone Fights With His Own Inner Battles

We all fight our own inner battles. For some of us, it’s like World War II in there. And we do not always know the details of people’s inner struggles. The only ones who really understand them are the ones who are fighting the battles themselves.

We are so ignorant because our minds are like a fast train. It generates frantic thoughts. It turns everything over and over again, it gives hypotheses about what is happening around us.

The mind makes assumptions. It creates new ideas and concepts, considers and reconsiders, expects the worst and judges others… And of course ourselves.

This relentless machine tortures us. And that leaves “mental rubbish” behind. Researchers claim that we have more than 60,000 thoughts a day . They estimate that most of these thoughts (about 80%) are mostly negative, toxic, and dysfunctional.

We are on autopilot most of the time. Because of that, we are strongly influenced by our beliefs. These are beliefs that we form in childhood that are incorporated into us through experience.

Some of these beliefs are in our subconscious. Our most immediate thoughts and judgments are born out of these beliefs.

The mind and its tricks

If some of your beliefs are wrong or unhealthy, so will your thoughts and judgments. We judge constantly. We judge ourselves and others. And what usually follows from these judgments is suffering.

Our minds give judgments to protect us, for our own survival. In fact, judgments serve their purpose.

We tend to think that the other person shares our point of view, and that is part of the reason why we suffer so much . We all see the world through different lenses. What one thing means to me means something else to you. We dare to judge other people because we believe that everyone should see things as we see them.

We even judge ourselves. We forget that we cannot judge the past from our present point of view. We now know the consequences, but at the time they were not safe, just possible, like many other options.

Either way, others will not make you suffer. In the first case, your own expectations of people will make you suffer. We expect everyone to be exactly as we want them to be. It makes us unable to accept them as they really are. This is what the fight is.

Paradoxically, when you stop judging other people, you will stop judging yourself. The way we judge other people tends to be how we judge ourselves.

Acceptance and love heal everything, even inner struggles

When you accept who you really are (including your mistakes), you see the mistakes of others more kindly. If we think someone is attacking us, it could be because they are dealing with internal struggles. They attack without consciousness.

The root causes are the emotional wounds and survival tactics they learned as a child. They were hurt when they only sought love and acceptance. Very often it is this that leads people to act in this way.

Therefore , keep in mind that they probably do not do it on purpose if you think someone is attacking you. It’s a mistake they project or you imagine.

Love grows as judgment shrinks.

We must learn to accept that the other people will not always act the way we want them to. Nor will they always treat us the way we want. They will do as they do.

We are here to love before we judge, and to feel before we justify. So if someone narrows their circle to exclude you, expand yours to include them.

Remember that love grows as we make our opinions more flexible, compassionate, and merciful. Love brings happiness, strict judgments bring suffering.

Do not think of love as something that you can give as a reward, or take away as punishment. Unconditional love is not so petty.

Sacrifice or warrior?

If we stop judging and start seeing with our hearts, our suffering will disappear. You can choose to be a victim of your battle, or you can be a warrior . A victim justifies, lies, blames, complains, and gives up.

But a warrior takes responsibility for what they have in life. They know they can not blame it on other people. They know they created it. And they know they are the only ones who can change their circumstances.

Life will give you lots of challenging lessons, but you decide if you want to be a victim or a warrior.

The truth is that those who do not learn from their mistakes are doomed to repeat them. They may look like different experiences on the surface, but deep down they are the same.