Young Adults: Children Know Things That Adults Ignore
They are only children, but they are growing and maturing faster than expected. Although their bodies may be small and still evolving, there are in them, little adults who know much more than we think they do. Children suffer and live through the same experiences that adults do. They have been pushed to acquire responsibilities that at their age should still not belong to them.
Many parents shut off from the problems their children may face. Or in other words, the problems they have and which affect these young people. Their frustrations, unhappiness, difficulties, all this is passed on to their children. Because, according to the adults, children will not notice anything.
“Raising strong children is easier than repairing broken adults.”
–Frederick Douglas–
Maybe you were a child who never felt the need to grow up beforehand. Maybe you have never felt tackled by the complications and difficulties around you. But many other children have no other choice. They cannot turn the other cheek and live out their childhood as a normal child would.
Little adults in a difficult world
It is possible that you can remember the moments when you were scolded for acting or behaving like a child. It’s ironic to say it this way, because you’ve probably heard phrases like this one. “Stop jumping around”, “Behave like an adult” and as is the case for girls, “Stop behaving like a boy”.
It seems that jumping and playing is wrinkled on the nose. From an early age, we are scolded for doing things that are truly typical of child behavior. Why do they force us to grow up? Why do they scold us for acting the way we are? Even when we are young, we learn that the sooner we stop behaving childishly, the better. But in some cases, this situation is far more pronounced.
Marriage problems between parents, violent situations, demanding too much of your children and arguing in front of them. All of this leaves a mark and affects them. Personally, I remember a friend’s situation. She told me that when she was young, she had to experience a very tense situation with her parents, where infidelity was the main character.
No child should ever fall victim to their parents’ problems nor be responsible for them.
She was not stupid
She understood everything, but they treated her as if she were ” stupid “. Unfortunately, she had to live through situations like pursuing a parent in the car and trying to discover the whereabouts of infidelity. She had to witness quarrels in the middle of the night that woke her up and made her cry. In addition, my friend suffered through situations of physical and mental abuse, which she had to witness in the first place. This little girl even had to act as a mediator between her parents. She was only 8 years old.
She completely remembers her father saying something out loud to her grandmother. A short sentence that made her aware of how wrong adults can be: “Leave her alone, she will not notice anything”.
Many years later, the whole situation took hold of her. It causes her to suffer from emotional dependence and immerse herself in toxic relationships. And we do not even have to mention the terrible lack of self-esteem and self-confidence she inherited from this childhood relationship.
Children feel everything
Children understand everything. They are small adults. They are not as stupid as adults seem to think they are. Therefore, in many cases we do not take them into account. We ignore them and make them experience scenes like the ones mentioned above . All of this has consequences for them, and as parents it is our responsibility to prevent it.
Let’s put ourselves in a completely different situation. For example, in all the poor countries, where very young children have to start working and bringing money home to their families. They are just children, but they already function as small adults. They have not chosen this lifestyle. Life has simply forced them to take responsibility for situations they do not have to deal with.
They are no longer children – they are small adults
These little adults are great at listening to others as they get older. They feel a little outside, with people of the same age. They are much more mature, have grown psychologically but not physically. Their experiences have marked them, and it makes them not feel at home with their peers.
Let’s let these children be children. Because this phase can only be experienced once.
Children must be children. They must behave like children, and we must allow it. They should never live through situations that may affect them in the future, especially if we can avoid it. But especially it is our duty to banish the idea from our thoughts that children do not understand the adult world. For they often understand much more than we think.
Underestimating what a child may or may not understand hurts them. Instead of helping their well-being, we have been a part of the circumstances that somehow ended up leaving a mark on them. Their tomorrow will be greatly affected by what they experience today. It is our job to take care of them.
