Trust Is Not Having To Know Everything

Trusting someone is like giving the most delicate gift you can give: your heart. Trust is a precious good, a treasure to offer with caution because it is the most beautiful aspect of friendship and the strongest bond in a relationship. You do not need to know everything about the person because the connection you have with them is unusual. Trust is necessary for intimacy to develop.

This topic goes far beyond the field of psychology. It is an emotional force that shapes our societal behavior – so much so that according to philosophy and sociology , the trust seen in humans is much more authentic and revealing than other animals. Other animals trust other members of their species through simple instinctive behaviors. Humans sometimes do this deliberately and often use a selective filter based on experience.

“Trusting everyone is pointless, but not trusting anyone is a neurotic clumsiness.”
–Juvenal–

Trust is a positive emotion that guarantees the strength of a bond. Few things define specific personality types better than the way they trust other people. A low self-esteem, a traumatic childhood or experience of betrayal can make you much more reluctant to give this gift.

Confidence issues are emotionally exhausting

One of the psychological and evolutionary benefits of trust is that it allows us to temporarily suspend our instinct for self-defense, insecurity, and fear . Few things cause more emotional distress than always being on the defensive, afraid of being hurt or betrayed in a given situation.

Trusting someone involves removing this uncertainty to simplify the personal relationship. You stop seeing the other person’s behavior as a threat and begin to assume that in the future, your interactions with them will be positive, that they will do nothing to harm you, that they will lend a helping hand, that they will always be ready to share their light and offer you guidance.

Trust does not mean that you have to know everything about your partner, family member or friend. That means you do not need an explanation. It means that you see sincerity in their eyes, that your mind is in harmony. Between the two of you, there is no demand, control or constant need for confirmation.

Keep in mind that the brain needs to simplify things and prefers to navigate daily routines without risk. It needs adequate emotional balance, and trust is the best weapon in this regard. When you think about it, we have all put ourselves on autopilot and proud that nothing bad would happen.

We all trust that the doctor knows what she is doing and will be able to help us. We all trust that when we go home, we will not encounter death around every corner. If we did not put this autopilot in command, we would develop neurotic behaviors that would completely disconnect us from reality and destroy our sense of balance.

If you want people to trust you, trust them

We admit here that when someone disappoints you, it’s really hard to trust them again. It’s like they ripped a piece of you out, like Shylock from The Merchant of Venice, who charges a kilo of meat as payment. It is a deep, permanent scar that often prevents you from getting close to someone again.

“The best way to find out if you can trust someone is by trusting them.”
-Ernest Hemingway-

The disappointments that hurt the most are the ones that involve your loved ones. But the worst part is that this feeling of mistrust spreads to other areas of your life. You stop trusting pretty much everyone until you become permanently phobic, a ghost pushed into the most isolated corners of society, by your eternal sadness.

Having confidence again is the key to your life’s intelligence

When some people have been betrayed, they think things like “I will never trust anyone again. People are hurtful, sinister and selfish ”.

Thinking about this causes irreparable chaos in your life, whether you want it or not. Humans are genetically and evolutionarily entitled to be with others. We trust others to create bonds; to strengthen us psychologically, intellectually and emotionally and develop the intelligence of life.

Life intelligence is the unconscious driving force towards survival and self-realization, where trust in ourselves and others is the most powerful source of encouragement. Because in the end, whether we want to or not, we have to open up to a person and embrace who they are, and then we can find ourselves again.

Few things in life are more satisfying than that.

Pictures of Pierre Mornet