There Are Situations That Last A Little Longer Than They Should
Prolonged situations where we do not feel good, in which someone hurts us, or where something happens that we simply do not like, are very normal and have happened to all of us more than once. Every writer knows that making the perfect ending is one of the most difficult challenges of writing a story.
Fear paralyzes us in a way in which our survival instinct is manifested. But when we overcome that barrier, the fear disappears. This is because what we fear in most situations does not happen at all. And if that happens, we’ll learn to deal with it.
“You are between what I have and what I am afraid of having.”
–Marilyn Monroe–
How to finish what should not last
Ending a situation is difficult because it complicates our brains with notions and premonitions that are mostly unlikely. It seems like there is nothing after the end. There is a void in which we do not know what will happen, but you must remember that often the best options are beyond fear. Beyond the situations that scare us.
Ending a relationship for example is something that can seem very complicated. But if you look at yourself a year into the future with someone you may not love anymore or who does not show you love, you will see that this is not where you want to be.
“You always know when a scene ends. A completed cycle, closed doors, completed chapters, whatever we call it. What it means is to leave behind the moments in life that are already over. ”
–Paulo Coelho–
The dual display of what would happen – if you do what scares you and if you do not – gives us a very realistic view of the situation and helps us deal with our fears and think objectively. The same technique can be used when it comes to our careers or other situations that do not make us happy.
Avoid self-deception
My partner will change. Over time, everything will change. At work, everything will get better. It’s not my fault that my partner does not love me… We have told ourselves these sentences more than once. And sometimes we keep thinking this way without realizing that we are cheating on ourselves. We forget that the ones we need to change are ourselves, not others.
Our brain is very good at cheating us because its purpose is the survival of the organism. It evolves, and sometimes it distorts the information we get from our senses. We all have blind spots in our brain. These are aspects of our lives where we are prone to self-deception. We deform reality to be the way we want it, and we tend to see only what we want to see.
“Remember that what you think makes you human, self-deception makes you sick.”
-Walter Riso-
The most important thing in these situations is to be very honest with ourselves and see reality (raw or not). Although we need some time to accept it, it is best to know what reality is. The sooner you accept it, the sooner you can move on. We may have some guilt in the situation we have to accept; a sign of maturity is to accept our responsibilities.
It is important to see reality as it is, with all its hardness. We need to look at the people who love and respect us. Ask your friends, your family, the people you appreciate. Let them express what they think. Reflect on what they say. And draw the appropriate conclusions from the reality of the situations you do not see or do not want to see.
Learn to grow as a person in all situations
Overcoming what we fear, moving forward, trusting ourselves, finishing things when necessary, are important parts of our learning in order to become perfect and show people; to learn that the way we live life is in our hands.
Ultimately, we are the ones who shape our emotions. This act is one of the most important sources of beauty in life. If we are blind to it, we lose it. For ourselves and then also for those who love us and are sincere, honest and loyal.
