The Consequences Of Bullying Must Not Be Ignored

We did not know what was wrong. He constantly complained of stomach aches and headaches. He did not fall asleep as he used to. He woke up confused during the night and got into our bed. We can see that he is worried about something that did not interest him before. We did not know it was the consequences of bullying.

He suddenly changes mood. One moment he seems calm and the next he may get angry and start crying uncontrollably. Sometimes he also behaves rebelliously when we ask him not to bite his nails or pull at his hair, behaviors we have never seen from him before.

Something’s going on with him, but we do not know what it is because he does not want to talk to us. We have a suspicion that something is wrong at school. Maybe the pressure on him is too great, or else there is another boy who is after him.

We keep digging into his surroundings. We also asked his class teacher, his brothers, his friends, his friends’ parents. But no one tells us anything.

Sometimes he gets very affectionate and even though he is a devoted boy, his attachment is worrying. Sometimes he demands our attention incessantly. Since we do not know the reason for these changes, we try to talk to him and understand what is happening.

Sometimes he shouts loudly and says he does not want to talk that he is embarrassed. But other times he tells us that he does not want to go to school, that something bad is happening. He finally reveals that the kids at school are after him, that some kids have bothered him and others and even beaten him.

The consequences of bullying should be addressed

Our world is collapsing. We have just found the cause of his pain, his anxiety and his discomfort. It’s bullying.

We immediately take the first step: We talk to the school. They have to solve this. These children need to see the consequences of their actions. Our boy can not go through this one more time. Not ours or other children for that matter.

It’s time to organize our ideas to see what we can do, how we can act on it. When something like this happens, it’s hard not to blame those who bully and their families. But we know what is best for our child so that he does not get into more conflicts and direct confrontations.

Therefore, we are waiting right now until we have come down to earth again and can control our emotions. These bubbling emotions do not make us think clearly, but it takes some time and avoiding the situation must satisfy them.

The most important thing for our child is to create a safe environment for him. We are already working on this. We do everything we can. The school has also gone into it. The teachers and friends will be aware of everything, and any attempt at bullying against our son.

But that’s not all. The emotional wound that bullying creates in our boy is still there. He has also told us that he is still scared and despairing. he refuses to go to school again. What can we do?

Help a child deal with the wounds and consequences of bullying

It is not easy for the family to help a child after being bullied and to try to process the wounds the abuse has created for his feelings.

• Establish a safe place and trustworthy environment. It is important to reassure them that there are people around them who will make sure nothing happens. Tell them that their surroundings are on their side and that those who carried out the bullying will be held accountable for their actions. Although it can be difficult, parents should avoid being overprotective of their child because it can lead to negative consequences.

Note: Although the schools take the necessary measures to avoid bullying, the child’s refusal to go to school again may persist. For this reason, it is important to let them know that the environment is safe, that getting back to school is positive, and getting back to class will help them feel better little by little.

We can promote the process of returning by gradually letting the child return to the school environment by having meetings with friends, taking a walk near the school or letting the child start with a few hours at the beginning until they understand, that there is no longer any danger.

Talk openly with the child about their ailments

Discomfort must be named, and the child is not always able to put into words their feelings of anxiety, sadness, or anger. Attention to the emotions is the first step the child must take to be able to process what has happened or is happening to them.

Use words that are appropriate for their age level and development to make them understand it better. Do all this without pressuring them and without feeling guilty about what they are feeling.

Teach them relaxation techniques and other means to get rid of the emotions

It is important that the child develops resources so that they can get rid of their tensions. Relaxation will be able to help alleviate any mental tension and emotion they are overwhelmed by. It will allow them to organize their thoughts and think of pleasant and positive things.

Fill their day with positive experiences to combat the consequences of bullying

It will help fight the ailments they have sustained. These moments are very powerful and will help the child come to think positive thoughts and give them memories that can support them in getting better.

Make an action plan for possible future conflict situations

We can talk to them about how to act in a situation where you feel threatened. Be careful about using expressions that may downplay their past, present, or future.

Strengthen their social skills

The child can be trained in conflict management as a foundation for their behavior. Assertive communication is the best way to resolve conflicts. It can deter the child from becoming the “little one” in front of others and help them make the best decision without shutting down.

Talk to them about the importance of asking for help

Asking for help does not make you weak or less suitable socially or personally. It is important to convey this message to the child, whether it has been a victim of bullying or not.

Strengthen their self-confidence in a parallel and constant way

Victims of bullying are completely deprived of their identity. For that reason, it is important to get them rebuilt without going completely into excessive praise of them.

As you can probably see, children and parents of victims of bullying suffer a lot. Therefore, it is crucial for people around these families to show understanding and empathy with the pain that such situations trigger.

It is also important to educate children with values ​​of respect and “zero tolerance” for violence and cruelty. It’s definitely the best way to do it by talking to them about it from an early age and setting a good example.