Irritable People: Anger As A Form Of Communication

Irritable people are addicted to constant anger. They slam the table, slam the door, shout and get tantrums. These people do not know how to communicate without raising their voice, losing their composure and getting on their heels. Behind this behavior, however, often hides a weak person who uses anger as a defense mechanism.

We’re all come up in the red box once or twice. We know what it’s like when anger takes over, and almost without realizing it, we explode in the most inconvenient and least tactful way. The important thing about these events is that we can learn from them. We learn whether we like it or not, how important it is to have a confident attitude when dealing with complicated situations where our emotional maturity is being tested.

On the other hand, there is an important aspect to consider. Even today, we still do not fully understand anger. What we do know, however, is that we should avoid irritable people in our daily lives to ensure our emotional balance and health.

Irritable people: Why are they like that?

In France, they have a really good word for this passive-aggressive behavior and people communicating through anger. They use the term ” sous-entendu “, which means something like “what is the basis”. What makes him use this destructive, emotional intensity? The answer is very simple: There is another person hiding, an injured person.

Let’s look at some of the things that can explain the dynamics of irritable people:

• Excessive fear. People who react with anger often have a lot of fear. The individuals who became agitated by the smallest thing as children and who responded to any stimulus with intense fear. As they got older, it continued. They got angry every time something was out of control. Anger is nothing more than a defense mechanism that they use to react to anything and everyone.
• Anger in response to all negative emotions. A person with this personality cannot feel whether they are sad, disappointed, scared, restless, surprised or embarrassed. All these feelings are understood and translated in the same way: anger.
• Anger is an accumulating problem. When an emotion does not expire, or is not understood and handled, it accumulates. Irritable people often carry around decades of frustrations inside. Therefore, the most insignificant things can cause the stored anger to escape.

• Anger and paranoia. This relationship is as problematic as it is remarkable. Irritable people are filled with fear and convulsive emotions they do not understand. This deep-seated anger creates a fearful behavior. Everything seems like a threat to them. They do not trust anyone because they think other people will only hurt them or make them laugh. This creates very difficult situations to handle.

How do you learn to deal with anger?

Irritable people do not have a good quality of life. From a clinical point of view, it is a problem that can not or should not be ignored. Studies also show that  these people are more likely to have heart problems, strokes, breathing problems, poor immune system…  Anger can also create an invincible distance to the people we love.

Therefore, these individuals often have what is called  staggered aggression. They may be angry at something or someone, but end up channeling all their negative energy towards those who least deserve it: their spouses and children… It is important to give them resources and techniques so that they understand that anger is not a acceptable way to communicate. Instead, self-confidence allows you to handle situations in a better way.

Simple strategies to deal with anger better

• We need to understand what anger is and its purpose. Essentially, it is a reaction that our brain emits to attack or flee from danger. It is a purely biological and psychological rash.
• The next step is to learn to identify your own emotions and understand why they come. Is what I feel sadness? Why do I feel it? If what I am experiencing now is shame, then what is the reason for it?

• Breathing techniques. One way to derive anger and rage that affects our body and mind is to learn to relax, breathe and concentrate on the tense muscles and the beating heart so that they also relax. Only when we are relaxed do we think better. Then we respond more appropriately.
• Replace anger with confidence. Another essential goal for irritable people is to learn to communicate confidently. Instead of using anger as a language, they should work on making confident communication their best tool.

Let us take another aspect into consideration as a conclusion. Sometimes an irritable person not only uses verbal violence, but often physical violence also becomes a recurring problem. Do not hesitate to react in these situations. Take precautions to protect yourself if you are a victim of violence. Act if it is you who creates these dynamics.